Posted by: viewfromtheriva | August 17, 2013

Bowling in paradise, Octopus in Split

Spaceship or bowling alley?

Spaceship or bowling alley?

My wife’s fabulous daughter Nastiya is here for the summer from Russia where she lives and after swimming, hanging out, going kayaking, etc.,. etc. she popped the question:  “can we go bowling?”

In Split? So I checked it out and sure enough one of our Zzzzzapp Wi Fi clients ( is Octopus bowling.

the girl can hurl

the girl can hurl

The place is a bit hard to find, but when we did and went inside it was literally out of this world—architecture and design by Dr. Spock!  At first I wasn’t sure it was actually a bowling alley or a strip club.  I kept expecting slinky women to come out of the walls, or at least aliens .  But after the guy running the place turned on the lights I saw that indeed, it was a four lane alley and maybe a landing strip for Klingons.

The place was so high tech it even recorded the score automatically.  My only complaint was those weird white floors.  They seemed  more like laminate than slick US maple alleys that make you feel like a million after throwing a perfect strike and hearing the pins explode.

The Octopus lanes were sort of a muffled ka-pock and those landing lights and blue horizon walls made everything seem a little slo mo.

So, how did we do?

Not having bowled in years, I was rusty but Nastiya WAS rust….despite her glam form.  Both of us were chucking gutter balls so often I thought they might turn on all the lights and kick us out of there.

After 20 minutes of absolutely horrendous play, we each racked up well below 100 for the first game—without a single spare or strike between us.  I was glad we were the only ones bowling!

look ma no ballIf you are looking for the ball here, folks, it’s in the gutter….

But still, it was a lot of fun and having paid $15 for an hour, I  figured after we got the rust out, we surely would do much better in games two and three.  And if we didn’t, maybe Klingon women really would come out of those walls.

the agony of defeat

the agony of defeat

Nastiya bet me I wouldn’t put this photo in the post, because it looks like I not only bowl VERY badly, but watch way too many horror movies, once dated Klingon women and absolutely forgot to take my meds.

Despite our geeky first game, I rolled a barely passable 119 in the second and watch out, began game three with a strike, spare, strike.  Who-wee, I was all set for a nice fat 180.  But whether it was thoughts of Klingon women or rust, it quickly all went south.

By the time the 10th frame came around all I could put together was a 135!  And Nastiya was so disgusted she decided to face backwards and throw the ball between her legs…..and of course almost threw a strike, leaving just the 10 pin standing!

All in all, a very cool experience in paradise… the former governor of California said, “I’ll be back……”







  1. Total failure for me in bowling, but success for you in writing. very funny))

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